On the latest Live Sessions edition of Fire Branded, I talked about a hard truth: being devout is not the same thing as becoming holy. External religion can coexist with stubborn sin, disordered priorities, and zero real interior change if we don’t confront what’s actually holding us back.

I also said I’d give the fuller list of sticking points that need to be addressed. So here it is — simple, direct, and worth checking yourself against.

1. An attitude disinclined to holiness

If your attitude is off, the rest of your devoutness won’t carry you very far. Do you have an attitude inclined to holiness, or just to the appearance of it? In the episode, I said you can go to Mass every day, say fifty rosaries, and live on your knees, but if your attitude is disinclined to holiness, it will not matter the way you think it will. You may be inclined more to piety, or the appearance of piety, than to actual holiness. It's a trap that's easy to fall into. Check yourself.

  • Do you want to be holy? Do you want to be like Jesus?
  • Don’t settle for looking devout instead of becoming different. Holiness should change YOU not just your lifestyle
  • Keep your attitude aimed at God changing you, not just at you doing Catholic things.

2. The hidden vice behind the obvious one

One of the biggest sticking points is that the sin you think is your main problem often is not the main problem. In the episode, I said the vice you can see is often only the outward expression of something deeper. Lust may be there, for example, but something more hidden may be feeding it — vanity, sloth, gluttony, pride, or something else underneath.

  • Don’t stop at the first sin you can name. Your real problem is hidden more deeply than that one
  • Ask what is causing that pattern to keep showing up.
  • As the Blessed Mother to reveal this hidden vice to you—the one you most need to address. You'll find it pops up everywhere in your shortcomings and failures.

3. Not really wanting to let go of sin

This was one of the sharpest points in the episode: sometimes we hate our sins, but hate letting them go even more. That is a brutal truth, but a real one, and usually we don't realize that THAT is the condition of our hearts/will/desire. You can say you want freedom while still clinging to the thing that keeps you bound. The first step is not just hating the sin. It is really wanting to be free of it.

  • Ask yourself honestly whether you want freedom or just relief.
  • Don’t merely “get over” sin — let it go. Fall out of love with it
  • Be honest about the part of you that still loves indulging it.
  • Ask Jesus to help you arrive at a place (interiorly) where you really want to be ride of a sin/sins you're holding on to.

4. Refusing surrender instead of cooperating with grace

At some point, growth in holiness means surrender. Not passivity. Not laziness. Surrender. God makes saints. We do not manufacture sanctity by force of will (that's fake devotion, and the form of piety without the substance of it). We cooperate with grace, with what the Holy Spirit is drawing out of us (TRUE piety), and with the work God is doing in the heart.

  • Surrender control and let God deal with what He wants to deal with.
  • Remember: your job is cooperation, not self-creation. Jesus Christ brings you to the finish line (holiness), all you can do is cooperate.
  • Be patient with yourself, and with God's process.

5. Living for service instead of self

A holy life turns outward. One of the practical ways to get out of spiritual self-absorption is to live with the principle of service in mind. Family, neighbors, strangers — other people are not just background characters in your life. You are here in part to serve them, love them, and put them ahead of yourself.

  • See others as more important than your convenience.
  • Treat service as part of holiness, not a distraction from it.
  • Stop asking only how your life is going; ask whom your life is helping.

That’s the list.

Not complicated. But definitely not easy.